I’ve always wanted to have a gal friend. They’re like the ones in the
movies or in the books I read where every female protagonist always got that
female bestie they can rely on. They would go on girl-nights and gush over cute
guys, and go mall-shopping together, then perhaps help choose each other’s
clothes. Whenever one gets heartbroken, they would be there to watch cheesy
romcom flicks with, and dine on pizza and Ben&jerry’s or perhaps talk and
share advice or stuff. There will be slumber parties, silly dances, LOL moments,
and a whole other stuff.
Once upon a time I was just being friendly to this girl because
she was new. I talked to her, well, most like she was talking to me about her
life. It was fine, because it was a natural getting-to-know process! She said I
was her first friend in the neighborhood: Great, because you’re going to be my
first female friend in this village too. Soon enough, she would knock on my
door every single day to hangout. Even if there was nothing much to do, we
would hangout because she hated being indoors and she wanted to talk more about
her life.
I was pretty chill with everything; was game for everything,
but soon I noticed how she saw me as a loser. When she said she needed advice,
she just wouldn’t listen to a thing I say! Like, she would interrupt me midsentence
and say “Yeah, yeah I know.” Then on she goes again ranting about her nonsense
problems that aren’t supposed to be problems in the first place.
It just wasn’t a give-and-take thing and it grew worse when
she claimed that I was her ‘bestfriend’, and she got mad at me once because I
refused to tell her a personal secret, and because I told her how we still
weren’t ‘close enough’. Bitch I have every right to my personal information!
Call me clutz but she just wasn’t a true friend. I’m sorry I’m
not like the chatty, catty and cute-sy girls you used to hang out with at
school! Not every girl is the same, and most certainly, I’m a different kind of
girl from you. I am totally game to hangout with someone different than me, but
there should be respect. I remembered catching her rolling her eyes at me for
something I did which was totally ‘me’. She didn’t see me for who I am, rather,
she only saw me as ‘my neighborhood friend.’
Girl, I’m sorry but I’m not the friend you’re looking for.
We can still hangout and help each other whenever there are events in the
neighborhood though, so no problem.
So, what’s with the title? As what I mentioned, she would go
knocking at my door every day and would ask with her huge plastic smile. “Want
to hangout?” Whenever I would have the tendency to hesitate or when I would say
no she would make a grunting noise, roll her eyes and ask me why, and blabber
about blablabla. It was as if she was making a huge fuss out of her refused
invitation. I told you she was very, very ‘mature’. Does she even know that there are different
kinds of people in this planet? And much more that there are such species
called ‘Introverts’? (*sarcasm intended)
There is a huge difference in my life already since I joined
the Youth Organization of my place. I went out often, met people and got
exposed. I was already a very active member of the Organization, and the teens
I’ve met are extraordinary, and awesome people. I remembered the latenight
foodtrips, the laughs, the teamwork, the conversations, the vents, the rants,
the dances, the singing, and the lazy afternoons with the guitar. This is a
summer I will remember. These people have taught me to smile again, and because
of them I have broken out of my shell brought by the pains of heartbreak. Now,
I smile wider, laugh louder and am back to being absolutely myself once again,
and it’s all because of these people.
Last words? Always stay true to yourself in a world full of
fake people. There will be times when people will dislike you for who you are
but someday you will meet people who’ll make you feel like you belong. It’s
better to be hated for who you are than to be loved for who you’re not. That
broken friendship you just had? Learn to let go, and hope the best in life for
them. Take a deep breath, forgive, and realize that there are 7 billion people
in this world. True friends do exist, I ensure you. We still have to meet them.
Never ever give up, because a true friend is worth the search.
Keep on living, loving and learning!! xoxo
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