Live, Love and Learn, That's Life

Let's face it, it's never nice to overthink. As girls, we loathe it when we over react, while boys find that one trait annoying when it comes to their chicks. Not all maybe, but I do know a lot to testify that.

I have to speak in picturesque speech because... Well, he might just read this. 

I was finally glad to be able to go out after lots of years being an awesome hermit. The sun was nice, the people were more than awesome, but then some..thing took me by the hands and lead me to a hurricane. So to think, I'd just broken out from my shell. It was my break from my virtual life. Then suddenly I was bombarded by a potato pirate with confetti and rainbow sprinkles.

I felt like Anna from Frozen as the gates were finally opened. Really, no joke. Only that I didn't marry a guy I met for  a day. 

For the entire year, I tried to be the perfect daughter. I wasn't a star student, but I tried my best and I know I've learned a lot from that school year, then I chose my friends and rarely went out to hangout with people. It was all family, family, school, school then maybe a lot of hobbies, and hobbies... But I wasn't really able to socialize propery. As a teen, I know I needed to socialize. I mean, how will I survive when I'll be standing on my own? 

That day I mentioned awhile ago was one very remarkable day: I was finally allowed to join the Youth Org. in our neighborhood. My happiness was incomprehensible.

But I was caught by surprise by some.. awesome inevitable gummy worm. 

The cheesy words came, and the awesome times, the heart emoticons and the texts c: I'm not saying I didn't like it, I mean.. it's just that It really shocked me. If I were Caucasian I would have blushed a million times. 

I mean, how I wish! That would make me a lot cuter I think.There is the feeling of blood rushing to your cheeks, and would then ransack the place and then rainbow would course through your bloodstream to your entire being. 

At some point I felt like a ten year old girl with a slight gap between her two front teeth who blushes intensely at some boy giving a silly heart drawn to a sheet of paper. 

It's a natural reaction for shy people. 

And oh my gosh. I realized, on this very day. April 14th 2015... It's been a year since all these weird love-drama-stuff happened in my life, and well I would totally like to say thank you to all those 'exes' aka 'Almost lovers' who didn't make it but they made life colorful, ya know? 

I had a wish back then, then I think it became true. 

Wait, is this what I wanted? 

Honestly, I used to be One of the Boys, AKA the girl version of a friendzone. I was too 'boyish' for a guy to have feelings for me. They see me as a bro, or perhaps an awesome sis. Then when school ended for 2014, I vowed to make changes to myself and be more 'girly'. If you need further understanding please listen to the song 'One of the Boys' by Katy Perry. Seriously, that song was the song of my entire summer of that year.
Not everything in the song totally applied my life, okay? The gist of it captured my goal: to be girly. According to the song 'I want to smell like roses, not a baseball team." 

I did many things: Jog with my friend, ate less, and in the end I enrolled myself into swimming lessons plus joined a little swimming competition which involved training. 

April 14 was the day I met my first... uhm. 'almost lover'. We only lasted for two months because when school came, we had to part ways. After that very first summer love, I met another guy somewhere in July. It ended, then another one came some time in September. It ended after three months, then the final one was by the whole month of February. 

People were always there to speculate, especially those who knew me. They had their eyebrow raised when they noticed how the 'weird girl' was not being her usual boring self. The gossips came, but I took it with a pinch of salt, thinking 'this must how being a celebrity feels like' and I tell you, I don't really like it. Yeah, people would finally get to know your name and face but then it's.. just annoying with the false information they give everywhere.

I mean come on, gossip is like a highschool version of Journalism, but instead of giving awareness to a truth, they try to sabotage the truth. 

The thing is: I don't regret meeting those guys. Every 'relationship' gives me something new to learn. First of all, I've learned how it feels like to be in a relationship, that there  are  different people in this world. We also
get to  learn a great deal in ourselves, and most importantly, at every 'break up' our heart's defense system levels up. 

So... Now that it's April 14 again, with a.. possible relationship at hand... Am I ready to face a whole new year of.. This and that?

Thinking about it overwhelms me. I mean, what lies in store for me? 

But nah, all I could say I guess is... 'Bring it on, Life. Try me if you dare.' 

xoxo Final words, Flockmates? Never lose yourself in the process of being with others. We only have ourselves. We're like one column, and the other someone should be like the other column. With the two of you together, you can support something entirely awesome. If you love yourself, you have that one column already installed inside of you, so that one day when your special someone leaves, then at least you can still stand for yourself. Not loving oneself is like leaning over to a column. So..  Be an awesome column and be a greek one too if you like!

As always, live, love and learn, because that's life :)